Blueberries more than just a cute fruit

RYAN REYNOLDS

June 12, 2008 at 3:18PM AKST

Free Nova Scotia! Free Nova Scotia!

Oh, wait. Hold on. I got caught up in the moment there.

You see, this week’s Weird Book is dedicated to Nova Scotians in exile. And it’s all about blueberries. If you’re confused raise your hand. (Don’t worry. Mine’s up too.)

At first “The Blueberry Connection” seemed like any other fanatical berry book. Some recipes, fun facts and folklore. Charming, innocent and just about cute fruit, right?
We couldn’t be more wrong.

But we’re going to get to the sweet, sticky, blue heart of this problem even if I have to knock off a few Smurfs to find what I’m looking for.

I was first alerted to danger when one of our security geckos squeaked out an alarm. (If you haven’t seen them, then they’re doing their job. No more questions.)

I had just pulled the book from the shelf for closer inspection and opened the cover.

That’s when I noticed the dedication. Hmm … exile indeed. The story grew sweeter when I learned that in 1978, the Nova Scotia blueberry market was $6 million. Interesting.

But things really started to heat up when I learned the secret name for a blueberry patch over there in Canada Land: A vision for thieves. Now I’m not much of a baker, but I’d say we’re about to have ourselves a dozen blue-collar crime muffins here. And if I have my way, they’ll be served with a side of Justice Jam.

Okay, so I’ve been watching a lot of “Matlock” lately. C’mon, who doesn’t like Andy Griffith? But that still doesn’t make this an innocent book.

Have you ever heard of a Whortleberry? How about a Bilberry? If they sound evil, then perhaps it’s because they’re involved in a Trans-Atlantic Black Market Berry ring. I never thought I’d see the day.

So if you’ve got a sweet tooth and the stomach for hard crime, I invite you to come on down to the library to check out “The Blueberry Connection.”

If you’re going to take over the world one berry patch at a time, you might as well whip up a mean batch of cream puffs along the way. Oh, and I’ve got my eyes on you Nova Scotia.

Ryan Reynolds can be found at the Library smelling old books and sometimes wearing argyle socks. He can be reached at 224-4082 or rreynolds@cityofseward.net.